With its 10,000 highly sensitive nerve endings, the main function of the clitoris is to give pleasure! Compare that to its male equivalent, the penis, which pales in comparison with a mere 4,000 nerve endings. Women achieve sexual pleasure primarily from the stimulation of the clitoris, a highly sensitive part of a woman’s anatomy composed of millions of nerve endings similar to that of the penis. When your clitoris is touched, caressed, rubbed or stroked (with varying degrees of pressure) you may become sexually aroused, the vagina becomes lubricated, expanding and lengthening with swelling of the vagina, labia and clitoris, and bringing more blood flow to this entire area. With this sexual arousal, there is an increased blood flow to the genitals and the tensing of muscles throughout the body, particularly in the genitals. An orgasm will cause the vaginal walls and muscles of the uterus will contract rhythmically.

Some orgasms are more spectacular and intense than others. Before and during an orgasm, your heart rate, pulse, blood pressure and breathing increases. The muscles everywhere in your body, especially in your pelvic area, can become tense and start to spasm.

How long should it take me to orgasm?

On average it takes men 5 minutes to have an orgasm, and women, well, no surprise, 13-20 minutes to orgasm. This is where foreplay becomes the key ingredient to success and allowing yourself to have a more intense and prolonged orgasm. This is an important statistic that I wish every woman and man understood so no one feels pressured to come together or quickly.

You are definitely in the norm if you are not having an orgasm with vaginal intercourse. Roughly 25% of women can have an orgasm during vaginal intercourse. If a woman is on the top during vaginal intercourse, a partner can stimulate the clitoris with his hand during penetration. Over 75% of women need some sort of clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm. If you are not having an orgasm with clitoral stimulation with your partner may need to give this important organ more attention. Stimulation of the clitoris by caressing, gently (or not) or licking this highly sensitive organ works well to achieve orgasm in a deliberate and slow fashion. Using a lubricant, extra virgin coconut oil and olive oil can heighten the pleasure of touch and help bring on an orgasm more quickly and more intensely.

Hard Having Orgasms

These are things that may make it harder to have an orgasm and should be avoided if possible.

• Alcohol
• Medications including antidepressants, anti-anxiety,  narcotics and mood alternating drugs
• Fatigue
• Stress
• Depression, Anxiety or other emotional speedbumps.
• Sexual inhibition

Communication and self-control is so important in allowing yourself to have a prolonged and enjoyable orgasm.

Health Benefits of an Orgasm

There are many health benefits of having an orgasm and they include:

• Comforting, calming, relieves stress, reduces anxiety
• Boosts confidence and sense of well-being
• Natural sleeping pill
• Stronger immune system-less colds, less sick days from work
• Lowers blood pressure
• Improves a woman’s bladder
• Gets your heart pumping
• Lowers risk of heart disease
• Block pains-menstrual cramps, headaches, joint pain
• Reduce risk of prostate cancer in men
• Counts as exercise!
• Look younger and live longer