Will sex harm the baby? 

 

The good news is that the baby is surrounded by 1-2 liters of fluid which serves as a protective cushion during sex.  The baby may be bounced around but know that the baby is safe and insulated. 

 

What are some normal reservations women have around pregnancy sex?

Sex is completely safe during pregnancy for low-risk women.  There are misconceptions that sex can cause a miscarriage so pregnant women and their partners are often afraid to have sex during pregnancy. Men are often afraid to have sex with their pregnant partners for fear of hurting the baby.

 

What are some general reasons why couples may not want to have sex during pregnancy?

The most common reasons women don’t want to have sex include:

• Lack of interest in sex…for the entire 9 months and beyond
• Weight gain makes pregnant women feel depressed and not sexy
• Breast enlargement is loved by husbands and partners but typically not by the pregnant woman.
• Low sex drive in having sex with partner, more interest in masturbation
• Prefer intimacy to be cuddling and kissing to intercourse
• Husband/Boyfriends are afraid to have sex with their pregnant partner
• Women are afraid to have orgasm, think that it could cause miscarriage or labor.
• Ask if oral sex is safe?  Bacteria from the mouth can it cause infections? Can fingers placed into the vagina cause an infection?
• Pregnant women often wonder if vaginal intercourse can cause a rupture the membranes–break the bag of water surrounding the baby.
• Each trimester brings a whole new set of circumstances that set the stage of for sex and intimacy.

 

Will an orgasm be different during pregnancy and cause a miscarriage or labor?

 

Pregnant or not, when you have an orgasm, muscles tighten and relax, there is increase blood flow to the genital area and your uterus contracts rhythmically.  When your uterus is a normal size, the size of a pear, you may not even notice that this is happening.  When you are pregnant and are 20 weeks and your uterus is the size of a melon you are aware of the contracting feeling or if you are 40 weeks when your uterus is the size of a watermelon you are even more of it.  The rhythmic contractions that you feel as a result of an orgasm are short lived and don’t persist.  It’s a bit of an old wives tale that orgasms can put you into labor.  Orgasms don’t officially cause you to go into labor, but it doesn’t hurt to try…with or without your partner. In pregnancy, women are more anxious and nervous about causing any harm to the baby or causing preterm labor.  Since having an orgasm requires your most important and largest sex organ, which is our mind to be relaxed and free of worry we have to be in the right mental state to allow an orgasm to happen.

 

How does pregnancy weight gain affect desire to have sex?

Body image insecurity is hard to anticipate but with each passing week and visit to the OB where you have to get on the scale…you are reminded about pregnancy weight gain.  Even if you know it’s the “right thing to do for your baby” it can be hard for your usual sexual pre-pregnant self when you have body insecurity.  For many women gaining more than 5 pounds can be emotionally devastating.  Weight gain and body changes are the hardest thing for women to overcome and may make getting naked an obstacle in the bedroom.

Can I masturbate?

YES! You can absolutely masturbate during pregnancy. If you are having any complications of pregnancy-signs of pre-term labor, uterine cramping, spontaneous rupture of membranes (bag of water breaking), vaginal bleeding, pelvic pain or uterine cramping, you should avoid any kind of sexual activity.

Always consult with your healthcare provider if you have any concerns or questions. 

 

What are the benefits of masturbating during pregnancy?

Pregnancy can be an incredibly stressful time. By taking matters “into your own hands”, masturbation takes the stress and anxiety away from partnered pregnancy set and allows you to have uninterrupted sexual pleasure.  Being in the right mood and with a relaxing environment helps your experience be a success.  Using fingers, hands, lubricants, sex toys, porn and fantasy are fun ways to masturbate during pregnancy.

A vibrator is a person’s best friend, especially in pregnancy.

Vibrators can stimulate the clitoris in ways that makes achieving an orgasm much easier and faster.  It’s ideal solo fun during pregnancy. Vibrators are an efficient and effective way of masturbating when you are looking for “me” time, especially if it’s your second or third pregnancy. Masturbation leading to an orgasm has many emotional and physical benefits which include:

• Calming effect
• Relieves stress and anxiety 
• Improves your sense of well-being, happiness and self-confidence,
• It can ease the pain and discomfort experienced during pregnancy 
• It is a natural sleeping pill

 

What tips do you have for safe, comfortable masturbation during pregnancy? 

 

The best sexual position for a pregnant person is often lying on your right or left side.  Ultimately the best position is whatever is most comfortable for you. Lying flat on your back for extended periods of time is not recommended since it can cause dizziness and can decrease the blood flow to the baby.

Be sure and keep your vibrator and sex toys clean to protect yourself against a vaginal or bladder infection. Untreated infections and increase your risk of more significant pregnancy complications. Always empty your bladder after masturbating. Wash your hands, wash your sex toy and have a great time under the sheets during pregnancy…with yourself.

 

What are reasons why people don’t want to have sex in the first trimester?
In the first trimester between the hormonal changes, fatigue, nausea and fear of miscarriage, sex is not a high priority for couples, or at least for women.  Contrary to what many couples believe, sex during pregnancy will not cause a miscarriage.  

What are reasons why people don’t want to have sex in the second trimester?

Your second trimester is your best bet to have sex because you feel more energetic, have not gained a lot of weight and getting along well with your partner.

What are reasons why people don’t want to have sex in the third trimester?

 

In the third trimesters you are suffering from lower back pain, carrying 30 (or more) pounds of pregnancy weight, feel swollen all over, including your vagina, losing urine on a daily basis and worrying that sex will throw you into labor. Because of all reasons sex is not a priority. 

 

Why can’t I have sex if I have a placenta previa?

Placenta previa is when the placenta covers or is near the covering of the internal cervical os.  This condition can be diagnosed with ultrasound.  Symptoms of a placenta previa include vaginal bleeding, hemorrhage and uterine cramping.  Due to the risk of excessive bleeding, sexual activity and intercourse in forbidden.

Why can’t I have sex if I am at risk for a miscarriage? 

If you are having irregular bleeding or uterine cramping you should not being have sexual intercourse or any sexual activity. A women’s risk for a miscarriage range from 10 to 50% depending on a woman’s age, the average risk being around 15%. The majority of miscarriages happen during the first trimester.  Sex will not cause you to miscarriage but you should not be active

Why can’t I have sex if I have ruptured my bag of water? 

The amniotic sac is filled with vital fluid that protects and nurtures the growing baby during pregnancy.  If the amniotic sac prematurely breaks or ruptures there is less fluid protecting the baby from infection and can be a very dangerous complication.  When PROM happens there is an increased danger to the baby and the mom.  Sexually intercourse is definitely not allowed if you have PROM.

Why can’t I have sex if I have had preterm labor? 

Preterm labor occurs when your body starts to go into labor before the baby is fully developed occurring before 37 weeks of gestation. Symptoms of preterm labor include uterine cramping and contractions, increased vaginal discharge, vaginal bleeding and backache. Sexual intercourse is not allowed since it can bring on some of these symptoms of preterm labor.

 

Why can’t I have sex if I have twins or triplets? 

More than 50% of twins and 90% of triplets are born premature.  If you are experiencing any signs of preterm labor including uterine cramping, contractions, back pain or vaginal bleeding sexual intercourse and sexual activity is not allowed.

Why can’t I have sex if I have a shortened cervix? 

During a pelvic exam or ultrasound the cervical length can be measured during pregnancy.  If there is shortening early in the pregnancy this may be a sign of an incompetent cervix which could put you at risk for a miscarriage or preterm labor.  If a shortened or incompetent cervix is suspected sexual intercourse is not allowed. 

What does it mean to be low risk to have sex or use sex toys?

A pregnant woman should avoid using a vibrator or sex toy if you are experiencing any signs of pre-term labor, spontaneous rupture of membranes (bag of water breaking), vaginal bleeding, pelvic pain or uterine cramping.  These are all indications to avoid any kind of sexual activity.

If you do not have any of these pregnancy complication and your doctor gives their approval, sexual activity is safe and acceptable, making you low risk for problems.

 

Are sex toys safe to use during pregnancy? 

 

Using sex toys is completely safe during pregnancy for low-risk women regardless of the trimester. One problem is sex toys are not regulated by the government so you need to make sure the toys you are purchasing are safe to go in the vagina, anus and mouth.

Avoid toys that contain phthalates-a potentially harmful (cancer and effect reproductive system) chemical found in sex toys that helps with making them more flexible and soft. Many labels will say “phthalate-free” and those are the ones you want to purchase. Other materials you want to avoid include polyvinyl chloride (PVC), vinyl and jelly rubber which often contain phthalates. Avoid toys that are absorbent, spongy, permeable-this increases the risk of bacteria buildup in the toy itself.

 

It’s best to use sex toys made of silicone since they are porous-free, reducing your risk of a vaginal infection, and are easier to clean. 

Here are some helpful cleaning rules to help avoid unwanted bacteria buildup that may cause vaginal infections.

• Always take out the batteries, unplug, and/or remove electronic attachments before washing and try to avoid getting electrical areas of sex toys wet.
• Avoid using harsh abrasives or rubbing alcohol on porous materials
• Toys made of silicone or glass may be boiled or run through the dishwasher. 
• Store toys in a dry cool place and avoid direct sunlight

What sex toys do you recommend to use during pregnancy that are safe to use?

Assuming a pregnant woman has a healthy and low risk pregnancy here are some of the sex toys that are safe to use during pregnancy.

Vibrators

An external vibrator is a girl’s best friend, especially in pregnancy.

Vibrators can stimulate the clitoris in ways that makes achieving an orgasm much easier and faster.  You can do it solo or with your partner. Vibrators are an efficient and effective way of masturbating when you are looking for “me” time, especially if it’s your second or third pregnancy.

Dildo and Strap-On’s

Many women love to have something inside their vagina when their clitoris is being simulated. If you don’t have a male partner, have a female partner or are going solo for some sexual satisfaction, dildos add that feeling of fullness inside the vagina while stimulating the clitoris. Dildos are the perfect sex toy to use when masturbating and are safe in pregnancy.

Ben Wa Balls

Ben Wa Balls, also known as Orgasm balls, Geisha balls, love balls, Kegel balls or smart balls allow your vagina to do some sexual bench pressing of the pelvic floor muscles. The weighted Ben Wa Balls places the vagina on stand by for something wonderful that is about to happen.  These sexually tantalizing balls go inside the vagina to help tighten and squeeze the walls of the vagina against them. This pelvic floor tightening is also known as a Kegel exercise can improve an orgasm and strengthen the muscles supporting the bladder and rectum.  This is a win-win sex toy for pregnancy.

Butt Plug

Perfect for pregnancy for those who enjoy anal stimulation.  Pregnant women often are concerned about sex toys going inside the vagina so Butt Plugs are a safe alternative.

Be sure and keep your sex toys clean to protect yourself against a vaginal or bladder infection. Untreated infections and increase your risk of more significant pregnancy complications. Wash your hands, wash your sex toy and have a great time under the sheets during pregnancy.